Tag Archives: Bisexuality

#Repealthe8th is an #LGBT issue

I am  delighted to have helped with an OP Ed by the Abortion Rights Campaign  in this months GCN on why #Repealthe8th is an #LGBT issue.


This was published after I traveled to Galway to be part of a discussion on this very issue as part of Galway Pride Festival.

I got to meet a so many  people, who had a range of sexualities and gender identities and I got asked to sign a cast.


I you want to know more click through to this months CGN issue and to page 16.


In Ireland we don’t have lgbtqi people being gunned down

In Ireland we don’t have lgbtqi people being gunned down, but we still have lives lost due to Homophobia, Biphobia & Transphobia.

Achieving marriage equality has not stopped lgbtqi people being beaten up.

Achieving marriage equality has not stopped lgbtqi people from ending their own lives.

Achieving has not stopped lgbtqi people’s potential being crippled by the impact Homophobia, Biphobia & Transphobia has on their mental health.

Achieving marriage equality has not stopped lgbtqi people from being or becoming homeless, from living in poverty, from struggling with addiction, due to the impact on mental health & emotional well being.

Achieving marriage equality has not stopped lgbtqi young people from having to stay at ‘home’ in nonsupporting toxic spaces, as they can not afford to move out.

Homophobia, Biphobia & Transphobia in Ireland ruins and takes lives in far slower crueler ways then bullets.

The LGBT Helpline is Opening early to day, from 4pm on wards.

Bisexual Visibility Day 2015




Bi Visibility Day, also known as International Celebrate Bisexuality Day, has been marked each year since 1999 to highlight biphobia and to help people find the bisexual community.

Events happening in Ireland,  The Bi+ Ireland Network have 4 meet ups happening in Dublin, Cork, Galway and Belfast.


We’re an Ireland-wide organisation working to create social and community space for nonmonosexual people based in, from, or closely connected to Ireland. Our aim is to create a space where bi+ people can make friends, access peer support and reduce any isolation they may experience. We aim to increase the visibility and presence of bi+ people throughout the island and to create diverse, vibrant and welcoming communities.

Get in touch either through here or with our email: biirelandnetwork@gmail.com
or on facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/1386176571628425/ or on twitter https://twitter.com/IRLBi


Every Autumn Equinox Bisexual people who can safely do so celebrate it in an effort to reduce bisexual erasure, and increase bisexual acceptance. This is important as bisexual people do not get the same support and acceptance gay and lesbian people do, from the gay or straight community. This leads to bisexual people being more likely to suffer from mental health issues and to struggle more in their life. Bisexual people are also more likely to also have experienced partner abuse as a result and also not to be out to friends and family.

Young people need to know that, yes for some people iding as bisexual is part of them discovering themselves and they may go on to eventually come out as gay, many people don’t. Bisexuality is a valid sexuality, it is not being confused, it is not being greedy, it is the ability to be sexually or romantically attracted to a person who’s gender is the same or different to your own.

Proud to be Bisexual

I wrote this after a call out for the Cork Pride Booklet asking for a piece from a Bi person, but due to some confusion over deadlines it won’t be included so I am publishing it here with additions.




I am Proud To Be living in Ireland in the 21 Century, not just the passing of the Marriage Equality referendum but the many more changes I have seen in the last 20 years.

I have very proud of the group of people who have come together as the Bi+ Network and the work which has been done over the last year to bring together, support and increase the visibility of non monosexual people in Ireland. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that there are so many of us who are Bisexual, pansexual and bi romantic in Ireland and from all 4 corners of the country.

I am proud of the work I have done as an out Bisexual person, in giving interviews on TV and Radio and of the raising the issue that Marriage Equality effects Bisexual people too on various social media platforms.

I am proud to see a generation of young people who have grown up attending the workshops and groups which BelongTo run all over the countryside being so open about being Bisexual and being so accepting of their peers being Bisexual.

I am proud that so many of our secondary schools have the Stand Up program running in them. That there are positive messages about being LGBT are being heard in many of our schools. That so many rainbow flags were raised on college campuses across the country.

That my own kids have grown up secure knowing that if they turned out to be LGBTQI that they were never have to fear being kicked out of the family or out of home and I hope that this will be the same one day for all teens.

Yes we still have to wait for the the marriage equality legislation to pass through the houses of the Oireacthas, yes there is still work needed on the Gender Identity bill, yes the health care services need to do better when dealing with LGBT clients. But what has been accomplished in the last 20 years makes me so very hopeful.

I was a teenager when homosexuality was decriminalized in Ireland, someone being ‘gay’ was a term mentioned in hushed tones or else there were unkinder words slung at people. Even after the change in the law it has taken a long time for the level of acceptance LGBTQI have to come about but it’s not finished yet.
Bisexual people still have to deal with having our identifies defined by our partners, which is absurd and more often then not we don’t hear the term Bisexual at all in the discourse we see in our media, from print, broadcast and even online media. Which is why the T shirt I wore at the Dublin Pride has the Bisexu Whale on it, if you are unsure how to say the word Bisexual, try pronouncing Bi Sex U Whale first.


We had just under 50 people walking with the Bi+ Ireland Group at Dublin Pride. It was the 1st time there had been a BI group with a banner, hopefully we will register earlier next year and so not be so far to the back of the parade. The feeling of solidarity was wonderful and so was having people cheer us. Unfortunately I did hear remarks from people as I was the lead steward for our group and walking slightly ahead of the block.

All of the comments came from white men, most of whom given what t shirts they were wearing I am going to assume were also gay men. 4 times I heard the phrase “Bi now Gay later!” also heard  “who let the breeders march” “bisexuals are real?!” and a few more which I won’t repeat. It seems We have a long way to go to combat Biphobia yet.


These two lovely members ordered Bi Pride flags and wore them, they had people tell them they were wearing the wrong flag, or just be utterly confused about the flag. But we did a huge amount for BiVisiblity by just taking part in the Parade.

So out of all the things I am Proud to be, I am Proud To Be Hopeful that we will as a Society keep moving forward with the acceptance and support for all LGBTQI people.

Ladies who lunch? Part 1

So over the last 10 weeks my daughter has been in a Mindfullness program aimed at teens, to help them figure out their emotions, triggers and find ways to deal with a range of things, from negative thought patterns, panic attack, temper outburts. While the teens have been attending the 90min sessions some of us parents would go for coffee or lunch and chat.

The parents I did this with all turned out to be mothers, rather then fathers as it’s still expected or easier for them to get time off work to do bring their children or else they are a stay at home parent due to the extra care their child needs.

It was nice to spend some time with them and to exchange war stories, to know my kids ‘weridness’ is actually pretty normal for kids on the autism spectrum. Over the 10 weeks we laughed, cried, shared and reached a certain comfort level. Our last ladies who lunch session was this week. The topic of teenage sex and sex education and the pressures on teens to become sexually active was trashed out over lattes, tea and sparking waters.

The point was made that it’s not really that different from when we were teenagers and they started disclosing how old they were when they lost their virginity. This was the end of my feeling included and the same as them. I don’t even define virginity in the same way, or even sex it seems. I had to decide would I be the only one who didn’t share, should I share but only speak to part of my sexual history which was similar to them perpetuating bisexual erasure or would I flat out say my first sexual partner was a teenage girl like I was.



So I took a deep breath, while no one said anything mean or biphobic, some were startled, and there were a moment or two of silence. No one asked questions, but then the topic was swiftly changed to if anyone was going anyway over the summer holidays and how difficult doing that is with children who don’t cope well with a change in routine.

It was a few moments discord in what had been 10 weeks of all just getting along, but it still happened. It’s been said that we never stop coming out, but I can see why people stop, as it can make life easier. Maybe I just need to go to lunch with a different type of Ladies.

Today is Bisexual Visibility Day.

What is Bisexual visibility day?
Well it’s a day to talk about and celebrate being Bisexual.

Bisexual erasure is something which happens a fair bit, it is the presumption that if a person who is Bi is in a relationship with someone of the same gender that they are now gay or if they are in a relationship with someone of the opposite gender that they are now straight.

The gender of the other person doesn’t change their sexuality they are still bisexual. They are still the person they were before.

There are a lot of negative assumptions about people who are bisexual and there is a lot of biphobia in society in both the ‘gay’ and ‘straight’ communities. The only way to try and reduce this is to talk about it and that won’t happen unless people are visible.

Celebrate Bisexuality day or Bisexual Visibility Day has been running for the last 11 years and has been spreading steadily.

There are groups and supports for those who are coming out as bi or who just want some support from others who understand.

Outhouse hosts a belong to group for teens to young adults and the Bi Irish group.

While a lot of people understand and accept people who are gay there are those who still don’t accept or understand that someone can be bisexual and that they are not greedy, or confused or afraid to come all the way out, or that they can not be in a monogamous relationship or that bisexuals are not likely to cheat more then anyone else.

Sexuality is not a binary, it’s not just homosexual or heterosexual there is a space in between, not everyone is one or the other some of us are attracted to people of either gender rather then just one.